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Monday, June 23, 2008

Shit, piss, cunt, fuck, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits

After hearing this morning about the death of one of the greatest comedians of all time, I had to thumb through one of George Carlin's books to come up with something to eulogize the great man. I may have not thumbed too well, but here's a shot:

"What is all this nonsense about angels? Do you realize three out of four Americans now believe in angels? What are they, fuckin' stupid? Has everybody lost their goddamn minds?
Angels, my ass! You know what I think it is? I think it's a massive, collective, chemical flashback from all the drugs -- all the drugs! -- smoked, swallowed, snorted, and shot up by all Americans from 1960 to 2000. Forty years of adulterated street drugs will get you some fuckin' angels, my friend!
Angels, shit. What about goblins? Doesn't anybody believe in goblins? And zombies. Where the fuck are all the zombies? That's the trouble with zombies, they're unreliable. I say if you're gonna buy that angel bullshit, you may as well go for the goblin-zombie package as well."
(From Napalm and Silly Putty, "Things that are Pissing Me Off" (pp. 180-181)

I'm guessing where George is right now, he's not seeing too many angels. But I'm sure Satan's having as many laughs with him now as I did listening/watching/reading his work over the years. We'll miss you, funny man.




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